CIM 2019 Race Report: OTQ, baby!

Ann CIM finish.jpg

Wow. Writing this three days after crossing the finish line at CIM, I am still a little in shock that I have actually gotten that sub-2:45. I knew I COULD do it, but I still can’t believe that I actually did. Having run 2:44:45 and making it just under the wire makes this feel even more like a true dream come true. Is this my real life?!? It is!! I have never been so relieved and overjoyed to cross a finish line. Words almost do not suffice, but I want to imprint that entire race and especially the last bit of it on my mind to replay forever because I cannot still believe that was what actually happened. That day felt like I was in a movie.

Crossing that line was like a pressure valve finally came off: not just the thoughts that I had been holding at bay for most of the race, but also months and years of wanting this, WORKING for it, and not knowing whether or not it would actually happen. I still just keep holding my head in my hands and shaking my head and saying “I can’t believe it!”: it is one thing to see other people run their sub-2:45, but it is another thing altogether when it is you yourself that has just run your first Olympic Trials qualifying time. Just pause and imagine that feeling in your mind. It is unreal, even if you have devoted years to achieving that as a goal.

This was not some race where I just was floating along on a little cloud the whole way, blissfully secure in my sub-2:45. The whole thing actually really kind of hurt and especially in the last 8 or so miles, I just willed my legs to CONTINUE TO DO WHAT THEY WERE DOING. The closer I got to the end, the more the mind was insistent that YOU WILL CONTINUE TO RUN JUST LIKE THIS. In past CIMs (this was my third), I have extremely distinct memories of passing mile 20, aka “the wall” because things got particularly gruesome after that in terms of the pain level: in this race, I basically missed that 20 mile marker, not because I was feeling super jolly but because I was so ultra focused on the steps I was taking at that exact moment and really locking it in….checking to be sure I stayed right near the three tall pacers dressed in their black singlets with “CIM to Atlanta” and the splits printed down the back…. checking my Garmin overall average pace to be sure I was 6:17 or below (I think it stayed 6:16 or 6:17 for really the entire race, or at least the back half!)….passing Mile 18 (I actually thought I was closer to 20 when we passed 18 and definitely swore a little bit in my mind but otherwise went right back to my internal metronome/mantra that I had going!). I remember the flash of the short red brick facade near 20 to represent “the wall” and made a quick mental note but otherwise kept just churning out my “one step at a time” and “keep doing THIS” thoughts. Finally, mile 23, just about 5k to go, everything is getting harder, saying prayers over the last 10k to my cousin Ian: “Ian, please help take away the pain in my quads right now” and becoming convinced that my quad pain was a little better! Passing that short bridge with the uphill which was slight but quite palpable at that moment, and then getting hit by a burst of rain which was just like a gentle wave of cloud settling over us and refreshing us. If this feels like I’m blurring together the last 8 or so miles, that is also what it felt like while I was experiencing it: I was so internally focused on my mantra of “just like swimming” (more on that in a bit) that I only allowed myself quick thoughts outside of this so they didn’t interfere with the positivity and hope that I was clinging to with all my strength.

Finally, passing my Aunt Melinda at mile 25 yelling that I was going to do it and steeling my mind for the mile ahead. Finally, passing the “800m to go” sign, glancing at my watch and seeing 2:41:something and knowing it could or would happen if I just kept doing THIS. Finally, the sign: “400m to go”. Finally, 200m to go and I can see the clock ahead of me and it says 2:44:something-low-enough-that-I-am-good! and sprinting for the line (under 6:00 pace for the last 0.2!), and crossing the two blue and red timing mats with a smile on my face (and evidently, according to video footage!: my arms waving like a joyful, semi-amazed, relieved, happy happy happy maniac! See that in this tweet here!). I immediately wanted to then lay down, so that’s what I did, just right there on my back for a few seconds, because I was SO RELIEVED and TIRED and HAPPY all at once, before another woman runner and a woman medic pulled me up (or tried to, as my legs sort of gave out on the first attempt). The medical woman asked if I needed a wheelchair and I told her no. My next mission was finding those I had been running with. The huge stampede of women, whose footfalls made real noise for the first 10k or so, had drastically dwindled around me as the race went on. Over the last 10k, I consistently saw this girl in an orange top and ponytail with little braids in it and one girl in a Oiselle outfit with two little buns on her head. I could just sense their energy—we never had to even say anything to one another but in my mind we were on the same wavelength—and pace. We were going to do it. I found Jenny and Amanda and gave them the biggest hugs. Having seen the celebrations of last year’s finish after the fact (I ran 2:48:31 in 2018 at CIM), this was also a moment I had dreamed of: to celebrate with those who had also made it right with me. Next, I wanted to find Chris (I keep accidentally typing his name as “Christ”: he really WAS a savior that day, haha!), the lead male pacer for us 2:45 women who was the best pacer in the history of pacers! Then I had to find my husband Phillip, who was right there across the fencing separating spectators from the finishers, and who has been absolutely amazing in supporting me in this journey.

The Race Itself

I really evenly split the heck out of this one. This was not essentially the plan: I really didn’t even have a plan except that I wanted to be sure I settled into a pace that felt sustainable and in that sweet spot of effort (and not just run what others around me were running) and then to pray that this sweet spot pace ended up being 6:17 or under. Heading into this, it made me almost a little nervous that I didn’t quite have a plan except to see how I felt and run by how I felt, but in my past marathon experiences, forcing a pace that happens to be just ever so slightly faster than that race day sweet spot zone only comes back to bite you in the butt! I did not map out going into this that mile X is more downhill or mile Y is more uphill, so I should except to be a little bit faster or slower for certain miles, etc. etc. However, I did know the general lay of the land from running CIM previously, in both 2015 and 2018. I do consider that to be a big advantage. I remembered the course well enough, especially since I had run it just the year before, to understand what I was getting myself into.

I honestly couldn’t have gone out faster than I did as there were such huge crowds around me that I was boxed in from front, back, and both sides for the first few miles. This may have even been to my benefit as it kept me right on the exact pace of that 2:45 instead of ambitiously gunning for a 2:42 or something! I was right around the pacers the whole way—at one point, honestly, I’m not even sure when, but maybe around mile 7-9 or so, I got a little ahead of the pacers and thought “No, no, this is harder! Get back there with them!!!” There is no way I’d have made it if I had charged on ahead. Chris, the lead pacer, did the best job both communicating with us about where we were pace-wise and time-wise the entire time. I knew he was trying to run exactly 2:45 or as close to the wire as he could, so it really helped over the last 5k to know that if I was a tiny bit ahead of him I was safe.

My miles were all between 6:08 and 6:20, but the great majority were in a much closer range (I ran 9 miles at either 6:14 or 6:15). My slowest mile was 6:21.2 for mile 13 (normally a mile where I have felt the early pangs of “uh oh”), and my fastest two miles (the only ones 6:10 or under) were mile 11 (6:08.5) and mile 23 (6:09.8). I think my pickup at mile 23 had to do with Chris announcing that we were EXACTLY on pace down to the second around then.

Below, splits! Ignore the end as I didn’t stop my watch right at the line. Instead I celebrated, lay on the ground for a bit, hugged people, smiled until my face felt like it would fall off, and THEN stopped my watch. My last 0.2 mi. was actually around 5:50/mile pace. (Click to enlarge.)

Below, pace and heart rate charts and the overlapping chart. No idea why my heart rate went up randomly around the 2:05 mark but hey, it went back down! (Click on photo to enlarge.)

Things that Proved Insanely Helpful to Me:

1.) The Sport of Swimming.

This is going to sound so goofy, but marathons are like that: you never know what thought, however silly it might appear to an outsider, is really going to make your mental state and thus your physical state for the race.

Directly behind Chris and determined to stay right there!

Directly behind Chris and determined to stay right there!

At the elite athlete technical meeting the day before the race, Danielle, the lead elite coordinator, asked Chris, the head pacer for the 2:45 women’s group if he’d like to say a few words. Well, Chris goes up there to the podium and lo and behold, his t-shirt reads “Boost Swimming”. Luckily, I had moved from the back of the room to one of the very first tables (I spotted fellow Cville runners Charlie Hurt and Carter Norbo up front and went to join them) so I was able to actually read it. This just made me feel SO much better that Chris was a swimmer! What were the chances of that! And that he would wear a swimming shirt to this meeting so I would even know this!? Unreal. It just felt like the stars were aligning. Also Chris was so peppy and enthusiastic and even brought us his custom singlet to show all us ladies what the three pacers would be wearing. He also explained that he was planning on running the “red line” of straight 6:17s the whole way. Chris just reminded me of just some guy who’d be on your swim team while you were growing up who just knew how to get people fired up in your lane all the time! He made us all laugh, and I was literally already getting tears in my eyes while I was laughing at his jokes (this shows you how nervous I really was). After the meeting, I went over and introduced myself to Chris and told him how I swim too!

Then during the race, Chris ended up being the lead pacer I was closest to so I essentially tried to glue myself to him. Once I realized I was tailing him, I also told him “I’m the swimmer!” For at least 3-4 miles, somewhere around 18-23, I literally ran directly behind him. At one point I even told him I was going to use him as a windblocker and he told me to go for it. At maybe 23ish, he told us he was EXACTLY at 2:45 down to the second. I am fairly sure this is what caused my 6:09 mile for mile 23, when all surrounding miles were more like 6:14-6:16. I am really glad I did this as making it by 15 seconds (or 12 seconds if you go by gun time) is scary enough!! No need to cut it even closer!

As I said, during the middle miles there, around 12-16, I was NOT SURE how this was all going to play out. Once I saw Chris right there and realized I was staying right near the pacers I just tried to keep myself on them since I knew that was my shot. Being near Chris the swimmer made me feel better. Somehow the thought came to me to do this race “just like swimming”: this became my mantra for literally 70+ minutes of this race. I just thought this over and over and over with my stride. I knew it would be important to not think too hard about what I was attempting to do during the race itself, especially because this was NOT feeling easy. I wanted to crowd out all other possible thoughts except the here and now, and the most helpful here and now thought was “just like swimming.” I thought to myself, pretend this is a swim practice. If this were a swim practice and you were just knocking out 100 frees on an interval, you would be able to do the same time over and over and would be just crushing it. I used my confidence from the pool and that I’ve felt all fall in my swim workouts to carry over here. In case you’re reading this and wondering where all this swimming business is coming from: swimming was my first sport, before running, and I have never stopped loving to swim, even while I ran in college at Notre Dame—in fact, though I did all my easy doubles in the pool during my Notre Dame running days, I still really missed swimming competitively and training more intensely on the swim end of things, and I consider the biggest plus of running post-collegiately to be my ability to swim as much or as hard as I’d like! Swimming to me is just magic in how it makes me so happy. It was my yoga before I did yoga, and it became a key not just to my training this fall, but also to my race here in a big mental/physical way!

One other random good swimming related sign for me on Saturday: swimming as on TV the day before the race! Swimming is never on TV! I really enjoyed watching the US Open from my hotel room and it helped calm me down and reminded me that I would not be the only swimmer out there the next day!

2.) My Cousin Ian

Ian has been a big part of my running journey over the past several years. In 2013, we lost Ian to suicide. He was in his early 30s. He was always someone I greatly looked up to, especially as I’m the oldest of 4 kids so he was kind of like my older sibling that I never had. It was extremely hard for me to deal with Ian’s death. For many nights I lay awake in bed and cried myself to sleep. Phillip, my now-husband then-boyfriend, could not figure out how to console me. I actually even had trouble talking to (even to mention it to) any of my friends for months but would just get bogged down in an awful feeling state.

One day in the fall of 2013, I was registered for a rather small 10k out in Waynesboro, a town about 30 min. from Charlottesville. Once I got to the race, I just felt emotionally HORRIBLE. Just very very depressed. The sky was so grey and I just felt like the whole world was weighing upon me with Ian not being here any more. I went to go pick up my bib number at the registration table and paused to put the pins in right there. Next to me, appeared a man with a hoodie pulled up. The registration person asked him his name. He said “Ian Fisher.” This is my cousin’s exact name, down to the last name. At this moment, I felt a calm come over me and knew Ian was ok and telling me he was ok. Experiencing a suicide of a family member felt a lot like losing faith in the world; this experience helped me retrieve that faith. During the race, I had to fend off a girl right behind me and was talking to Ian in my head the whole time. I ended up winning the 10k! I know Ian helped me win that race. Looking back on that race, that was a true turning point in my running career. From that race forward, I got closer and closer and then finally surpassed my college times, while previously to that I had honestly been struggling to run a 19 minute 5k while in grad school and having weird and persistent health issues. (I ran the Tinkerbell Half in Ian’s honor and raised $1000 for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention in 2015. Though I was the second woman to finish, I met my goal of beating the previous course record… by exactly 1 second. More on that in this blog post here.)

Last year when I missed the OTQ at CIM, I immediately planned on coming back for 2019. I found out the date of the race for 2019 and immediately got choked up and cried: December 8th was Ian’s birthday. I knew I could make it just based on the date of the race. I thought, ‘well, December 8, 2019 is the day that I am meant to make Olympic Trials.”

Over the last 10k, I prayed several times to Ian to take away the pain building in my quads. (I was getting quad tightness already around mile 11 or 12.) I honestly think it worked: my quads still hurt but weren’t so bad that I was unable to move: instead I could grit through the tremendous pain and keep keep keep going. After the race, I could not wait to text Aunt Judy, Ian’s mom.

3.) Getting Moved to the Elite Start List on the Tuesday before the Race + Managing My On Course Hydration/Nutrition Perfectly

Water Bottles ready for action!!

Water Bottles ready for action!!

I was previously in the “seeded start” but due to last minute scratches, got bumped up to the elite start. I had filled out a short survey of those seeded runners hoping to move to the elite start and hadn’t gotten my expectations up (we were told not many would be bumped up and I thought I was probably right on the border). On Tuesday, as I left the pool, I checked my phone and discovered I had made it! OMG!

The elite start meant some very helpful perks: I would get the special charter bus to the start instead of having to take the school buses. I would get to chill in the elite tent before the start and have access to the porta-potties there. Most importantly, I would be able to have my own on-course hydration: elites get to drop off 7 water bottles the night before which are carefully positioned over numbered tables. Here is where I have to additionally commend and applaud CIM. I have been to marathons where elites are tripping all over themselves to get their bottles and I have been at marathons where I have missed at least half of my bottles or where they weren’t actually even set out! This was not the case here. I easily could spot and grab all 7 of my bottles of GU Roctane Summit Tee located on Table 14!! Everything was so well marked: CIM even had signs in advance of the elite tables that read “elite fluid stations ahead" so you knew to be on the lookout!

The elite tables contributed to really great hydration and nutrition intake for me too. I had one GU about five minutes before the actual start, and stuck a backup GU in the front of my sports bra for emergency purposes. I then had either 4-5 GUs over the course of the race (at miles 6ish, 12ish, and then I think at about 17 and 21 though the end is a bit of a blur there!). I ran the first two miles holding a small bottle of cherry pomegranate flavored Ultima Replenisher which I finished. In my 7 water bottles, positioned about every 3 miles, I had the equivalent of 3.5 packets of GU Roctane Summit Tea (875 calories total)—some of the earlier bottles I didn’t finish, but most of the middle ones I did, and I had probably half of the last one before tossing it. I really think it benefitted me to hold on to those bottles during the 13-21 mile range and keep sipping them. This is the same drink mix that I used for my longer long runs, and I often felt myself becoming reenergized while drinking it! It seemed to work great here!

My Training Overall This Fall

This is going to blow people’s minds, but I did absolutely zero running workouts at a fast pace this fall (I’m talking anything where I tried to pick it up at all, so no tempos, no track workouts, no long runs where I tried to hold marathon pace or anything near that). This, by the way, is also how I usually operate, so nothing new there! I also raced a good bit, which is also usual for me: 11 races from the beginning of August until CIM in distances ranging from 1 mile to half marathon. Just mentioning this to re-emphasize that you have to find what works for YOU even if people think you are nuts. Also, if anything I raced slightly less this fall, and sometimes had gaps of 2-3 weeks between races. This meant I sometimes went 2-3 weeks between races where I was running no faster than a 7:xx mile for ANYTHING. Most of my running I actually do at 8:something or 9:something pace. I consider a run where I average in the low 8s by myself to be a run where I am hauling and must be really feeling myself!

It is also worth noting that while I do no running workouts outside of racing, I DO do a lot of other exercise as I’m a full time yoga and fitness teacher. I taught about 11-12 fitness classes per week all fall: 3 running classes (and I include that running in my daily mileage), 6 yoga classes, 1 spin class, and 1 class called Cy-Yo (spin followed by yoga). All of my high-intensity work during the week comes from my 45 min and then 30 min. spin sessions on Monday and Wednesday, as well as my plentiful time swimming in the pool which was reliably higher intensity on Tuesday, sometimes on Wednesday, usually on Thursday, and always on Sunday. My Monday swims tended to be more chill and long. On Fridays, I only sometimes swam. On Saturdays, my swims were usually very short and chill. Overall, I have a definite refined rhythm to the intensity and volume of each day of the week that really works.

I usually run 6 days per week, but towards the end of this cycle, I started taking Thursdays off from running too. This happened sort of by mistake—I was so tired on Halloween (a Thursday) that I just decided to not run. Then, I felt so good on Friday and Saturday from taking Thursday off that I decided to do that the next week, and then the next week, and so on. Sometimes instead of taking Thursday totally off from running, I would instead go out and literally run one mile at 10-11 minute pace as easy as possible. As marathon training progressed, I built up my Tuesday and Wednesday runs to be around 10-11 miles each, so having Thursday as an off or “barely any running” day really helped—this is something I’m definitely going to continue in the future for my last 6 or so weeks of marathon training.

Below: (L to R) saw a double rainbow from my hotel room the day before the race when I was feeling really nervous, two photos from immediately after the race taken by Phillip, with Phillip in the VIP area afterwards, found Chris the pacer!, with Charlie Hurt who also qualified!, with all the OTQ ladies on stage!, in the hot tub afterwards!

Continue reading below for weekly mileage breakdown, etc.!

A couple notable workouts

For this cycle, I really wanted to do one very solid long run. I did some research and found some website that I no longer remember the name of that said 4 weeks out is good. So, I did that! On Saturday November 9, I woke up at the crack of dawn (hard for me on the weekend if not racing!!) to ensure I had company for my “time on feet” run. I was aiming for 3 hours and ended up doing 23.23 miles in 3:00:06 (7:45 pace). There is literally no way I could have run that fast alone, so huge shout out to Ali and Shawn Kelley and the little group we had out at Dick Woods Road that kept my company for about 18 miles of that. That was also a FAST long run for me!

Rachel Tischler, a recent UVa grad and UVa Club Running alumna, kept me company for nearly all of my other major long runs. Rachel was amazing long run company—we always went just the right pace and had great conversations the entire way. I am really looking forward to returning to our weekend runs once I recover from this race!

Last but certainly not least, I owe a lot to my swim buddy Claudia who I trained with all summer—we really pushed each other, and I would never have had such a good base if it weren’t for my hard core summer swim workouts!

I also have to mention the craziest workout I did all fall, which was to race a half marathon in 1:22:00 on a very hilly course and then add on to get 17.45 miles for the day and THEN go to a swim meet where I proceeded to tie my best time in the 200 FR (2:11) by swimming in the lane next to Claudia. I also did the 50 BR (not a fun stroke with tired legs so was a weak sauce 38.3, haha!), the 500 FR (only 5:55 which I have done in practice many a time but at that point the fatigue was kicking in hard core), and then finished off the day with the most painful 100 IM of my life (1:16, ouchies….this was also about 4 minutes after the 500 FR concluded, so I’ll let you just imagine the lactic acid there for yourself!). Not a workout I would necessarily recommend to others but dang, I had so much fun doing it!!

Breakdown of weekly mileage:

The second column is my exact weekly mileage, while the third column indicates my Saturday and Sunday runs for that week rounded to the nearest number. In pink are weeks that included races. A dash means I took the day off!

Takeaways/Where to Next?

This is a heading that I always include in my marathon race reports, and I can say that it feels amazing to say: Atlanta is what’s next, baby! I honestly still cannot believe it.

I knew my sub-2:45 was very much in the realm of possible things that could happen, but leading up to the race I was definitely telling my husband and family things along the lines of “well, if I don’t get it, at least I can go win more races in March while those really fast folks are recovering!!!” I was trying to not put too much pressure on myself, but I really really really wanted that time. I maintain that the time leading up to your marathon, especially the week and the day before, are just insanely nerve-wracking. I would like to say that taper period gets easier with more marathon experience, but it really hasn’t so much for me, especially with this one. I just wanted this so badly, even if I didn’t quite want to say that out loud to too many people. I tried to gain confidence from remembering that I have always operated well under pressure, and man, this really was my last shot because I didn’t want to try to go to Houston!

Right now I am planning on my usual two weeks off from running (I’ll just hit the pool and swim in the meanwhile as I feel), and then will map out a plan ahead of the Trials, where the goal will be both to PR and to soak up every single second of being there.

Thank you so much to everyone who has trained with me, cheered for me, and rooted me on during this journey!

If you have a big goal, keep at it. Remember that I was once always picked last in gym class and told on a very regular basis that I was very slow. Hard, smart work, plus persistence, plus believing in yourself will get you further than you ever thought possible.

Massive shout out to Nicole Bush of Nicole Bush Media for capturing the images below of me with fellow qualifier Amanda, who was near me for the whole last 10k and I just knew she was going to make it too.

Ann Mazur9 Comments